It's Like Deja Vu, All Over Again

The last couple of days have been challenging. Actually, they've been challenging, emotional, and frustrating. And exhausting. Did I mention exhausting? I don't want to say that the last couple of days have been terrible, because I can think of plenty of ways that things could have been worse. But these have been a trying couple of days.

Staph has made an unwelcome return to our house. Eight months ago, I hoped it would take a permanent hike; we're fortunate that we caught it when we did. It started out innocently enough: it looked like Phoebe was just getting a nasty diaper rash. But one little bump kept getting bigger while the other ones disappeared with a few applications of Desitin. Then the bump got painful; Phoebe wouldn't even sit down, and diaper changes became nightmarish. So we were off to the pediatrician.

Dr. B quickly assessed the bump as an abscess. We've gone down that road before. And Phoebe had to have it drained, which was frightening and painful. The doctor feels pretty confident that the culture will come back positive for MRSA. Thankfully, we're home -- and not in the hospital. But Phoebe's having to endure some extremely painful at-home treatment; every diaper change (and they happen every 90 minutes) brings excruciating pain for our little bug. We're praying that she won't have to endure another drainage procedure at the pediatrician tomorrow.


I've become extremely emotional about this whole mess. I really can't explain it, but I think I've cried more today than Phoebe has. For the last couple of nights, I've had vivid dreams about terrible things happening to Phoebe while I watch helplessly. I'm feeling some of that same helplessness with Phoebe's pain; there is nothing I can do to make it better for her, and in fact, I have to do things to her that temporarily make her pain worse. This has definitely been a challenging exercise in trusting the Lord and His never-failing goodness.

Do pray for us -- for quick healing for Phoebe, and for endurance through this trial. I have been particularly discouraged lately, and I'm finding all of this overwhelming at times. But we are so thankful that Phoebe's pediatrician was able to start treatment immediately, and that we are not in the hospital all over again.